Gone is my song...

Ever have a song that seems to push you through tough times? I do... well did. It seems I no longer have the need for the song anymore. Just listened to it and had no more positive response to it. Guess it's just a reminder of the bad now. Or better yet, a realization that I am getting better. Just gotta let it go.....


I AM GETTING BETTER!!! (that felt good...)

Thyrogen shortage

So after tonnes of digging, I knew I would find something in writing about this shortage. There is nothing to be found on either Genzymes website nor ton the Thyrogen website. I as a patient requiringthis drug find it somewhat shady that this info has to be a dirty little rumour floating around. So you don't know anything for sure until you go to your pharmacy to fill your script only to be told some genaric info about it not being available. Then what? Treatment is rescheduled? Cancelled?

So I finally got my hands on the info, the letter is addressed to healthcare professionals and was dated in Nov 2010. Causually mentions a the delay will be for a "short period" and advises Dr's to "consider this when scheduling patients".

I spoke with a local Thyrogen rep, who told me I will not be able to fill my script until AFTER May when shipments resume. She could not tell me the reson for the shortage. Her carefully scripted answer let me with more questions than answers.

Here is the letter:

What's your take on the issue?

***************************************************************************

Edited on Feb 15 2011 to add this recently found letter with a slight bit more info. Thanks to Thyroid Cancer Canada for posting it

Before and After cancer photos

Just thought I would share a pic of me before my diagnosis:

Me before cancer

Me a couple of weeks ago

Raising Funds and Awareness

Because of my currently ongoing battle with cancer, one of my passions now is helping out where I can to raise funds and awareness for cancer and cancer research. Without our help a cure will never be found.

One of the ways I got involved this year was by teaming up with an organization called Road 2 Recovery. Road2Recovery is an annual event that supports cancer and cancer research. I attended their big fundraising gala and was photographed for their yearly calendar. The calendars are $20 each! What a steal eh?! They can bepurchased from me directly or here:

http://www.road2recovery.net/calendar.html

Wanna see? I am in pink pictured with one of my dear friends. I have since cut my hair and coloured it so I look quite a bit different but rest assured that is me and I would LOVE to be your miss January! lmao

My Cancer

So at my last BIG appt, I went in expecting the worst news, because that's usually what I get. Instead my Dr. told me she had GOOD NEWS! She said the cancer is almost gone. The levels are so low, in fact, that they were almost undetectable. I wanted to cry.

What that means for me is that if all goes as plans I will need:

*one more time suffering one the Low Iodine Diet.
*Two more injections of Thyrogen
*One more dose of RAI
*another Whole Body Scan

and then I'll have more info, hopefully it will result in my first ever CLEAN SCAN!

I need it soooo badly. I need to kick this cancer's ass and get past it.

My year in review

Since so much time has passed I'll give you the cliff notes version of what's happened this year.

*I continued going through treatments, and worked really hard to get my meds regulated. From a thyroid standpoint I think I am finally there (or at least really close).

*My depression is another topic. I still fake my way through many a day, but I am more open about it with the people who matter most. I admit it's a challenge I feel like I am failing at. However I am taking ALL steps neccesary to get it under control.

*I still have cancer BUT it's almost gone!!!! I'll blog about that sepreately.

*My sister got married!!! Yay!! When I was struggling to keep my mind on things not cancer related her wedding filled that need! I planned the best wedding shower ever (In my opinion of course!) Check it out if you are so inclined. Here is the post from my other blog. and some of the DIY prep I kept occupied with here in this post

*I'm still not back to work, and I've really struggled with what to do with myself once I hear those all consuming words "Cancer Free"! Keep reading to find out what I wind up doing.

*Hubs got a great new job! I'm so proud of him! He's kept this family afloat while I was ready to give up.

*Roo and Aussie are doing well. I adore them. They are what pulls me through a rough patch!

That's about it... for now.

Thank you.

I've been gone a long while. I need a break. I needed to stop waiting to die, and let myself live. The year has been rough in many ways. My grandfather passed away after his battle with lung cancer, a friend who was like me in many ways (young wife and mother) lost her battle with cancer, but not before making me realize that I was wasting my life by wallowing in the sadness and anger I had. She was the one who gave me that shocking wakeup call that if I did die, my last time on this earth would have been completely wasted and my family and friends would remember me as a quitter. The moment I read that email from her I stood up to cancer and took my life back. Not long after that another friend also lost her battle. It began getting really hard watching people fight so damned hard only to lose in the end. Good people, brave people and people who even in the midst of their own illness took time to help me see what I was doing to myself.

To Julie and Sandra I will be eternally grateful for your words of wisdom and advice. I wish you were both still here to see your children grow old. One thing I can't get passed is how unfair it all is.

WE NEED A CURE NOW.